One of the major themes/thoughts/problems with this whole year abroad living in France is missing the home country and comforts! Being so far away really brings out the child in me, and all I want is to go back home, sit in front of the TV with my Mum and Dad, have the wonderful homecooked food come fresh out of the oven (I don't have one, and when you don't have one, you want everything you can't have!) and to just chill out. Hell, why not throw a cat on the sofa into the mix and right now, that seems pretty perfect! I'm not sure what brings out these feelings of missing home. I'm content here, I know what I'm doing and I generally enjoy myself so I don't really have any huge reason to be missing England so much.
There are some silly little things that make England make much more sense to me than here! This may seem pedantic and weird, but even the supermarkets are messed up! I went looking for raisins, so I went straight to the baking section of the supermarket, where you'd usually find dried fruit in England, but they weren't there. After walking around for a good 10 minutes, I found them all next to the fresh fruit. Now, this isn't particularly weird in itself, but the fact that for those 10 minutes I was thinking 'I'm pretty sure the French do eat raisins....I wonder where they are...Maybe they're specialist over here...'. This just messed me up. Even supermarket logic is silly over here!
Missing England isn't constant! I don't want to worry people that I'm insanely unhappy here, because believe me I'm not! I actually quite like it here, and the missing England often seems purely irrational, but I just can't help it. I think it's when I'm stressed anyway, and when I'm in the middle of a long term away from family it gets harder because I know that my Mum's amazing pizza is weeks away and that so much can happen in the time when I'm here. My sister organising her wedding makes it harder too, as I can't go and see her try on any dresses because I'm in France. I plan to make the most of it over the summer though, and help/hinder her with anything possible.
Missing home is odd. I spent so long itching to get away, and now I'm here, all I want to do some of the time is get back! Goodness knows where the logic is there. It's the little things you miss, I could die for a crumpet, a bag of salt and vinegar crisps and the NHS (I had a headache for 3 days, and the French medical care is nowhere near as good as home, you have to pay the doctor at each visit and get it 70% reimbursed, so it's not free, despite the taxes!). And my cats, and my Mum and Dad, and all my lovely friends and the rest of my family. You don't realise what you have until it's hundreds of miles away! So all you people, appreciate it, next year, I'm going to be annoying everyone to make up for lost time!
I'm sure next year, there'll be a similar post entitled 'Missing France' as there are things about this place that I wish we could have at home! I guess it's a case of the grass being greener on the other side, and I guess living in a country for 21 years and then leaving it does mess your mind up a bit as you have to take everything on...alone! I'm sure in a day or two I'll be fine, but for now, I'm going to raid my Cadbury Dairy Milk and English Tea supply and enjoy a baguette for lunch. Perfect marriage of the two at lunch time I think!
A+
xxx
Thursday, 11 March 2010
Thursday, 4 March 2010
Public Displays of Affection
Here is a little note about the French and their relatonship habits, which, in short, is that wherever you are, it's always time to stand on a street corner staring lovingly into your partners eyes, and get in the way! I understand that it's perhaps not as intense as some other countries like Spain and Portugal, but it's definitely something I've noticed since being here!
Perhaps I'm just full of English reserve, the lack of queuing here annoys me sometimes too, but that I can deal with. Seeing 15 year olds snogging on the street corner you need to get round is something I'm a little less able to handle! It seems that here, it is acceptable to just proclaim your love for someone by not leaving them alone. In England we're more of the 'get a room' view, but apparently here it's more 'go out into the middle of the street and show everyone how much we love each other'!
Now, I don't want to sound bitter and twisted because I am single and out here, as believe me, I'm really not, it is, however, something that has struck me. I remember being on the metro in rush hour during the first few weeks of being here, and a couple who had clearly just come from school went about 5 stops, and from the moment they got on until the moment the girl had to, sadly, leave, their lips were locked together. The rest of the carriage was pretty much silent, and all anyone could hear was this teenage couple making out. The strangest thing about this whole situation, was that all the other French people on the metro were not even phased by it. It was normal. There were none of the looks you'd get in England between other passengers which make a 'tut' without having to say it! I felt mean for wanting them to leave each other alone and talk about common interests instead!
I'm not sure how the national mentalities of France and England have come about that this kind of thing is acceptable in one country, and slightly grotesque in another. Yes, I've vaguely got used to it, but each time I see another couple sharing an intimate moment (the other day in front of a leopard cage at a zoo, with families milling around) there is still something in my head that says, 'get a room'. I'm sure it's not just me, I have spoken to others about how forward people are here, but it's still something I find very uncomfortable, even though the French really dont care! Crazy Frenchies!
A+
xxx
Perhaps I'm just full of English reserve, the lack of queuing here annoys me sometimes too, but that I can deal with. Seeing 15 year olds snogging on the street corner you need to get round is something I'm a little less able to handle! It seems that here, it is acceptable to just proclaim your love for someone by not leaving them alone. In England we're more of the 'get a room' view, but apparently here it's more 'go out into the middle of the street and show everyone how much we love each other'!
Now, I don't want to sound bitter and twisted because I am single and out here, as believe me, I'm really not, it is, however, something that has struck me. I remember being on the metro in rush hour during the first few weeks of being here, and a couple who had clearly just come from school went about 5 stops, and from the moment they got on until the moment the girl had to, sadly, leave, their lips were locked together. The rest of the carriage was pretty much silent, and all anyone could hear was this teenage couple making out. The strangest thing about this whole situation, was that all the other French people on the metro were not even phased by it. It was normal. There were none of the looks you'd get in England between other passengers which make a 'tut' without having to say it! I felt mean for wanting them to leave each other alone and talk about common interests instead!
I'm not sure how the national mentalities of France and England have come about that this kind of thing is acceptable in one country, and slightly grotesque in another. Yes, I've vaguely got used to it, but each time I see another couple sharing an intimate moment (the other day in front of a leopard cage at a zoo, with families milling around) there is still something in my head that says, 'get a room'. I'm sure it's not just me, I have spoken to others about how forward people are here, but it's still something I find very uncomfortable, even though the French really dont care! Crazy Frenchies!
A+
xxx
Monday, 1 March 2010
Letting out my philosophical side!
You guys are going to have to humour me for the next, maybe, 5 minutes. As I get further into this whole experience, my poor little brain is raising questions of a philosophical nature, as would any change like this I guess. The main thing on my mind at the moment is fate and luck, what they are and whether we can really control them. As a bit of background on this, I was/am (I have yet to decide) someone that believes that you create your own luck, a positive outlook and perseverance means that you get to where you want to be. In terms of fate, I'm indecisive, like everyone, I like to think I make my own decisions, but something tells me that all is not as it seems. So, I compromised and decided that for each decision you make, there is a predestined result, at the end of which, you take another decision. You make the decision and thus in a strange way, decide your fate.
Since being in France, I'm not sure which I am more inclined to. There have been times this year when I have been fed up, ready to go home and just about at the end of my tether, it's what living hundreds of miles from everyone does to you! But then I've managed to convince myself that this is all in my best interests. After all, I had been wanting to have this experience for nearly 4 years before eventually coming here. I don't know whether it is fate, or luck that made me change my mind and realise that this whole thing is really positive. I'd like to think that it was my own strength of character, but I'm not sure I believe that!
There's also the 'problem' of working out whether the people you meet is all by coincidence, or whether there's something more behind it. I count myself very lucky to have been able to share this experience with other people from Southampton I genuinely get on with. Aisling, and now Andy are there to help me out, and we really do get on. There are plenty of other people that could have been here, and I'm sure I would have argued with some of them, and stayed away from others. These two, however, seem to help me along! I've not had any real arguments with either of them, and particularly at the start, I was so glad to have someone here reading from the same page, and who I actually wanted to spend time with. God only knows how my year would have been without that. Now, is that fate, or is it luck, or is it just coincidence? It seems too 'lucky' to be coincidence, but then I don't like to think that it was just by chance that it happened. But then surely fate isn't that controlling, if it exists at all?
The people you meet has two levels. There are those, like Ash and Andy, who I knew were going to be here, and others that I meet along the way. I'm starting to believe that a certain amount of this year is luck as to who you meet. By being just 30 seconds quicker into a meeting or lecture, you can meet someone who you get on with, 30 seconds later and no doubt they'll be talking to someone else. I'm not trying to fob off my life here onto chance and fate, but it is something to be considered, and at the moment, it comes as a comfort that sometimes I haven't done anything wrong!
I've also been very lucky with those from home who have continued to care about me. It could have been so different, as moving to a different country isn't like moving to uni. I have experienced things that some people won't understand, yet I'm so grateful to all who have let me whinge at them about the 'stupid frenchies' and their stupid ways of doing things. I'm lucky to have the people around me that I do, that just listen, or even ignore my ranting!
At the moment, I'm not sure what to believe. I wish I was in control of everything, but as I know I am not (no-one can control the world), I do have questions about just how much is in my control. No-one can predict the future, so there's no way of controlling it, but I would like to know just how much is down to me! Anyone wanting to help me out of this little quandry, please do so!
A+
xxx
Since being in France, I'm not sure which I am more inclined to. There have been times this year when I have been fed up, ready to go home and just about at the end of my tether, it's what living hundreds of miles from everyone does to you! But then I've managed to convince myself that this is all in my best interests. After all, I had been wanting to have this experience for nearly 4 years before eventually coming here. I don't know whether it is fate, or luck that made me change my mind and realise that this whole thing is really positive. I'd like to think that it was my own strength of character, but I'm not sure I believe that!
There's also the 'problem' of working out whether the people you meet is all by coincidence, or whether there's something more behind it. I count myself very lucky to have been able to share this experience with other people from Southampton I genuinely get on with. Aisling, and now Andy are there to help me out, and we really do get on. There are plenty of other people that could have been here, and I'm sure I would have argued with some of them, and stayed away from others. These two, however, seem to help me along! I've not had any real arguments with either of them, and particularly at the start, I was so glad to have someone here reading from the same page, and who I actually wanted to spend time with. God only knows how my year would have been without that. Now, is that fate, or is it luck, or is it just coincidence? It seems too 'lucky' to be coincidence, but then I don't like to think that it was just by chance that it happened. But then surely fate isn't that controlling, if it exists at all?
The people you meet has two levels. There are those, like Ash and Andy, who I knew were going to be here, and others that I meet along the way. I'm starting to believe that a certain amount of this year is luck as to who you meet. By being just 30 seconds quicker into a meeting or lecture, you can meet someone who you get on with, 30 seconds later and no doubt they'll be talking to someone else. I'm not trying to fob off my life here onto chance and fate, but it is something to be considered, and at the moment, it comes as a comfort that sometimes I haven't done anything wrong!
I've also been very lucky with those from home who have continued to care about me. It could have been so different, as moving to a different country isn't like moving to uni. I have experienced things that some people won't understand, yet I'm so grateful to all who have let me whinge at them about the 'stupid frenchies' and their stupid ways of doing things. I'm lucky to have the people around me that I do, that just listen, or even ignore my ranting!
At the moment, I'm not sure what to believe. I wish I was in control of everything, but as I know I am not (no-one can control the world), I do have questions about just how much is in my control. No-one can predict the future, so there's no way of controlling it, but I would like to know just how much is down to me! Anyone wanting to help me out of this little quandry, please do so!
A+
xxx
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